Poems About Limitations By Yajaira Calderon

Poems About Limitations By Yajaira Calderon

By Yajaira Calderon

Conversations with My Mother

Knitted gloves, socks & sweater 

        vests like armor 

      cold burns between 

laughter and soft sobs 

       sonic nourishment  

       vitamins and 

                                hijacked thoughts

emotional wounds wrapped 

            in flour tortillas

anger transpired 

            on spicy salsa 

            cream on bruises & beans, 

            cheese & chiles dipped in wisdom 

ammonia perfume on the right hand

onion perfume on the left 

            lemon juice to tame wild hair

musical meditation &

tears in the masa de tamales

            branded with kisses

            caressed with the belt 

                                     apologies ironed on flesh

 

Don’t you know I just want you to be happy
& I just want you to be free

 

Imprisoned in a Sanctuary State

Palm trees are the bars of my cell, mapped by 

monotonous highways that seem never-ending

wanting, waiting for the sentence to be over,

to run away I try the I-5

to explore the limits of the cage

to breach the borders of the 105 & 710,

but i'm tethered to the center

trapped in the land of the free

aboard this physical plane 

on a no-fly zone. 

So i write these words on my passport,

translate them to my native tongue

and other foreign ones i’ve learned,

until the ink runs out.

 

Encore

tried his words in my mouth

they cut my tongue

but I swallowed them 

still

by the side of the stage

I watched him sing

love songs to everyone 

else

he fell to his knees

exhausted and consumed 

by their energy

tried to lift him 

but his arms

dissolved in my

hands

Encore! Encore! Encore!

they demanded

I begged them

to stop but

they couldn't hear 

me

 

I begged him 

to stop so

he left 

me

And after his exit

he owned me

still

by the sense of loss

I'd been left 

in

Encore! Encore! Encore!

time to do your best work

the chanting was

defeaning

I opened my mouth

and

his words spewed out

like venom

not a person was 

left standing, not even

me

 

 


Yajaira (pronounced thx-a-lot-mom-n-dad) earned a B.A. in English with an emphasis in creative writing and a minor in French from the University of California, Davis, where she wrote for the student paper The Davis Beat. She is alarmingly obsessed with music and is completely incapable of writing and creating without it. She is eternally grateful to her grade school crushes who helped prepare her to deal with rejection, which has become valuable in her pursuit of the title “published author.” She will attend MSMU’s grad schools program in the fall. Twitter: @wiseyness

Two people with insecure attachment styles pushing one another away with defense mechanisms already built in childhood

Two people with insecure attachment styles pushing one another away with defense mechanisms already built in childhood

Disillusion

Disillusion